Martin?Eisenstadt Wrote:DesElms shows up trick-or-treating at Janko's front door, then a few short weeks later Janko dies mysteriously in a one-car auto accident. Coincidence?
I don't know about actually tinkering with the car, but that meeting had to be quite an eye-opener for Janko.
No doubt all his miserable life Janko had been an outcast, a loser and non-achiever who imagined he had something on the ball but who couldn't seem to convince anyone else of it despite trying incessantly.
For the first time in his dolorous existence he had found a little niche for himself, as a loyal member of Bear's stalker crew. Hell, the mighty Bear even mentioned his name in one of his obscure little books, and spelled it right too. Wow, now he could hide behind his computer keyboard, spew his bile and bluster, and enjoy the accolades of all the other losers, perverts and non-starters who cling to Bear's robes.
Then suddenly there's a knock on his door, way out in the middle of rural Michigan, and standing before him is Elmer the Whore Meister himself. Janko's worst fear realized! Somebody really had wasted the time and money to hunt him down, confront him, and discover what everyone with any sense already knew, that Janko was a wussified little piece of crap who couldn't slug his way out of a wet paper bag.
Janko surely had read the comments about Elmer here and elsewhere. And suddenly he realized we were right! Elmer really was a nut, and the people Janko thought were his friends and comrades-in-arms were all just a bunch of stalkers and mental cases. And even worse, that he had far less to fear from the so-called millists he had been stalking than he did from his new buddies.
Janko's entire reason for existence suddenly vaporized in a flash. He probably was pissing himself the whole time Elmer was there, fearing he might be gruesomely murdered, or sodomized and mutilated, or forced to consume liquor and drugs. The sordid possibilities must have upset his already tenuously balanced mind.
He called his hero, the omniscient KKKlempner, only to realize that his idol considered him a laughable fool. Klempner viewed the entire incident as just another humorous tale to be spun and milked for entertainment value and profit. If the laughs came at Janko's expense, who cared? And the astute readers here deduced exactly who Bear was laughing at, even if he didn't mention him by name.
If Elmer didn't literally drive Janko off the road, he surely contributed to driving the unstable Janko over the edge. And give Bear an assist. Tough break Janko, but your life was a small price to pay to provide a funny story in Bear's next book.
