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Thursday, September 30, 2004 ( 9:51 PM ) "and when i turn out the light, it feels like i'm giving up the good fight" - dark room notes i hope that that song is not about waiting until marriage. yuck! it would be awful if i hinted that something was gonna happen in here. i am awful. things are so weird. i am less awful. i wrote "haikus" in creative writing today. i havent quite mastered the art, but it is a nice stress buster. i also found some nice files on my computer: 1. a story about polar bears. and i read it and liked it. so much that i cant continue it. i wish it was longer though. and some other stuff. i wish those daffodils had lived forever. cordelia # Wednesday, September 29, 2004 ( 9:09 PM ) when they kick at your front door, how you gonna come, with your hands on your head or on the trigger of your gun? mmm. i love the clash!!! i dont like when i want to help someone but i dont know what to do. tomorrow i want to be on the quad and listen to the clash and do my homework. i want to see a list. and i want the leaves to be bright red. i am so tired of the brown leaves that i crunch over at 5am. so tired. sleeping in today was so nice. i might do it whenever i have health... except that i am addicted to endorphins. and not eggs. last night i PRed. i have gotten really comfortable with my 100, as long as i remember that feeling crappy while swimming means you;re working. i have a 1:29 now. it is so nice to be out of the 1:30s. (by a whole .68) now i just need to get from 38.78 to 38.32. mmm! i bet i can. i didnt hit my chin on the bottom this year. hurrah. cordelia # Monday, September 27, 2004 ( 9:50 PM ) RAWRRRRRRRRRRRRRR. man. i sort of actually like. ok, i do like what they're playing on 1071 right now... melodic hardcore? whatevs. it's perty good. today i taught some german class. more about that later. oh... the 1071 thing is: "dilusion and discord." tomorrow is pajama day. i am a ho? is another pointless entry yeah. and oh gosh darn, i forgot about the BS/CLG game! um! mark just said i was really annoying... trouble in paradise?!!?!?!!? (haha) bed time! cdilly # Sunday, September 26, 2004 ( 2:44 PM ) but everytime i look up at that ugly moon, it reminds me of you last night i went to see alyssa in her first big screen movie. she looks really good in black and white. i told her that she was hot, and some guy laughed at me, but i'm sure he agreed. we went to leave. we left... but oh no! shruti hadnt said goodbye to maayan. but wait! the door was locked. oh man, never underestimate the power of the pout. and then the power of the bootay. and the power of the loud kinzie. before the movie we played football and volleyball. but for me football is mostly just run after the person with the ball, and then hold onto their shirt until they fall down. or tickle them if their name is kris. uh... i landed flat footed on some concrete. that sucked. apparently my landing instincts need some sharpening. um. whatelse? um. someone has a really funny voice. i have been making WAY too many "dirty" jokes. they need to stop. off to fnb! cordelia! # Saturday, September 25, 2004 ( 4:59 PM ) black box recorders dont lie mmm. i just remembered: i love alkaline trio! so... first things first? 1. i went to the dmv today to get a replacement permit. it tooked them at least 1 hour and thirty minutes. i missed the bus to charleston. FORTUNATELY, my mom was planning on going, so she just took me. UNFORTUNATELY, i missed warmups. oh boo hoo. SUDDENLY, it was time for me to swim the 200free. holy fucken shit! i thought to myself, i dont really know how to swim this. what if i lose count? what if i burn out? what if? what if? but i beat the girl next to me, yeah you know it. by almost two laps. and wait, wait for it, here is the best part: i dropped 28 seconds. HOLY FUCKING SHIT. IT WAS SOOOO EXCITING. this meet has been excellent! the best ever? maybe. 28 SECONDS. 28 SECONDS. yes! so what if i havent swum it for... a while, it's 28 seconds. oh yes. yay! a pr. oh hooray! i must say that the two things that helped most were 1. kinzie cheering by the side of the pool. 2. being able to see how much i was beating the girl next to me. what about yesterday? hmmm! oh yes. in order: 1. i found the physics quiz very challenging. 2. then i was talking to ben sims before german and he was like "yeah, i guess on almost all of those." and i was thinking, this makes me feel so much better and then maciek was like "oh yeah, i guessed on like one on the last test but i didnt guess on ANY on this test" and then i was like "hm. well i thought the baseball problem was really hard, and he was like "the baseball one?!?! that was EASY!" taken aback, how could anyone be so insensitive? i decided a reply was in order, "Well, YOU'RE easy!" good job cordelia. 3. one family is just bitches. (M). anna, shruti, holla! 4. at play practice we practiced conjuring. YAY YAY YAY! yay yay yay! BYE! oh man, also kinzie had vegetarian marshmellow cream on the bus. OH MY YUM!!!! cordelia! # Friday, September 24, 2004 ( 10:20 PM ) i will always be the king of pain? tomorrow: 1. physics 2. maciek 3. pesky family (M) 4. the dancing I LOVE SLEEP! I HATE DONUTS! i cant wait for my hat: "deli meat" thanks shrooty booty! deli selects might be better but so... um. brandy. whatevs. i just watched Paris Is Burning. more tomorrow. crordleihdn~! # Wednesday, September 22, 2004 ( 6:49 PM ) if you cant think once, dont think twice today was [a. sooooo good b. no good] sooooo good. swim practice this morning was nice. we did 5 100s at race pace. we also got ooodles of rest. it was challenging, but so much better than last year when people would look like they were gonna die and half to sit out... and bla bla bla. while i was swimming i kept getting excited and happy. and it was surprising so early in the morning AND it distracted from my swimming. but i think i can finally pace myself. i'm not exactly sure why i'm so excited. let's make a list (the first time in FOREVER). why i am not excited: 1.math 2.physics why i could be excited: 1. my mornings 2. good food 3. the play 4. my comic but i am definitley excited that shruti, anna, josie and i chillaxed and chizzated during second. (i didnt finish my math). THEN, during fourth, i planned to do my math, but talked to julie, roveiza, nuole, lucy, tom, austin and ben sims instead! it was fun. we were sitting in the alcove and then moved outside to the sunshine. and i didnt go to gsa. i like the people of gsa. but i dont really like gsa. i like gay people, and support them, and whatever. but i do not like that when i go to gsa, if i do not raise my hand, if i have a conversation (even if it is GSA-related) i am yelled at. no, seriously, if you want me to be quiet just ask politely, but yelling "SHUT UP" and appearing obviously flustered does NOT help. also, recently, there has been some discussion of whether the three co-presidents of GSA were elected, or appointed. Whether GSA is a democracy, or a commune. Whether this is fair. Whether they should be presidents. Whether they are familiar enough with the club and whether they plan out way too much. listen: i am not saying i agree with these speculations, just that they exist. they are also not necessarily my reasons for spotty attendance. and neither is AVC. to conclude, a short list: i would like to: sleep outside see the dessert know my lines by oct 18 see alyssa in her movie this saturday become a vegetarian go on a big bike ride learn more espagnol! ADIOS! cordelia # Tuesday, September 21, 2004 ( 8:52 PM ) zombies sind nicht mer am leben! winks are an easy way to catch people off guard. today i took the green. i missed the orange. Whoops! i never take the green so i couldnt remember were to get off. i chose state and university so that i could walk by the park. EEK! unluckily, the bus went another block (such occurences now seem inevitable!). but i was walking north to get back onto university and some people honked and waved. they were in a white car. it looked vaguely like tom's, but that is a total guess. so if that was you, tell me. por favor. i was super productive and read my creative writing stories while walking. i think it slowed me down a little though. anyways. i was wearing my shades. the sun was shining on them. it was warm. all was pleasant. i saw billy and nick lore and i was like "hey guys," but i have a feeling that my voice was barely more than a raspy whisper. not that it matters! the end. # Monday, September 20, 2004 ( 7:04 PM ) i just need to admit that i want sugar in my tea. i love weezer. i have become a terrible speller! i almost wrote: grewp for group and tee for tea. there are more examples, but i forget. i'm really excited about the play starting. today in german herr w talked about a chance to do a year in germany either senior year or as a year off. i definitley wouldnt do it senior year, and i'd never thought seriously about taking a year off, but it seems really fun. i was going to ask if there were ISE style rules about drinking, but i started giggling too much to look innocent. i'm sick and tired of arrogant pricks being rude and not accepting that having a bad day doesnt make you elite. holla if your know what i mean. today at lunch we were all chit chatting, and it was really nice. oh yeah, i need to get ALL my homework done so i can maybe go cheer on sunday. mmm. i love rad cheering. it makes me sooo rad. rad. rad. rad. i have to go ingest chocolate milk! cordelia # Saturday, September 18, 2004 ( 5:50 PM ) going surfing cause i dont like your face ?!?! i just had my meet. i left my book on howie's bag. i really hope he finds it. otherwise i am trouble. i swam one event. i was there for like four hours. it was a drag. then i asked if i could drive home and my dad didnt want me to. and then he was like "do you have your permit?" and of course i dont. funny how he only asks when he doesnt want me to drive instead of just assuming i had it cause i had already driven to ann's. i like weezer. i think i'm going to go bike away. cordelia # Thursday, September 16, 2004 ( 5:29 PM ) what do pimps brush off their shoulders? (?!?!) so my bra straps just refuse to stay under my tank top straps. acknowledging this, i wear pretty straps. this isnt trashy, is it? i dont think i failed my math test! in fact, i think i did quite well. but it is hard to tell, maybe i just learned everything wrong. oh no. oh no. johnny ramone has died. as of wednesday. this is sad. also, the buses seem to hate me. today i was at the stop and i saw it coming so i moved to the edge of the side walk. then i waited for the light to turn green and started to read. he didnt even stop. luckily, i looked up in time to do my bird impression, flapping my arms madly, i started running after him. fortunately, he stopped. the other day i pulled the stop c(h)ord so that my bus would stop in the pavilion's driveway and i could skip merrily home. but wait, it wasnt stopping "Are you gonna stop?" I inquired. apparently the bus driver was under the wrong impression that she was only allowed to stop at corners and was supposed to get from one end of her route to the other as fast as possible. no. no way lady. the mtd's job is to take people where they wanna go. not two blocks past it. ok, so it seemed like a bigger deal at the time. oh, the winky story: so at the beginning of the year i was very, very sad. alyssa was no longer in german. my partner of two years, gone. i expressed my sadness to cameron. he agreed to be my partner. tuesday, herr w announced that we had a partner arbeit. naturally, cameron looked back at me to see if i remembered. i did! to indicate this, i sent him a little wink. herr w, being the uber perceptive man that he is, caught this small gesture. he actually stopped talking and recoiled. so then i, and not cameron (?), had to explain. so then he thought we were crushing or something. i dont even know! herr w's thoughts are confusing and indecipherable! but i dont think cameron will keep being my partner, i think he's confused. and embarassed. WHOOPS! um: i sort of smell a little, but it is nice. clg! p.s. i got it # Tuesday, September 14, 2004 ( 9:47 PM ) screw this crap i've had it, i aint no mr. cool yay. i found a dust covered pinkerton under my radiator! also, i found a picture of dan hedin and jans! hardy har har! i would bring it into cw because the story is funny, but then molly might think i had a crush on one of them! (?!?!) there was also a really nice picture of maggie. i should bring it to her. today i auditioned. um... it was okay. my reading of elizabeth was um... terrible? maybe not, just, uh... well, let's just say bad. but that is ok. i just hope that if i get cast i can find some way to give my character sexual tension. time for history. i have started radical cheering to myself. also, i need to start speaking in german so herr w can write me a recommendation saying "cordelia is great at german! let her work for you." but he saw me wink at cameron today, so i dont know. that story will be told next time i write. -cordelia # Sunday, September 12, 2004 ( 8:58 PM ) strange how the ears ring, after a night of wrong doing today at food not bombs, i chomped down some rice. on my last bite i got this insanely hot piece of spicy spicy food stock on my jaw. it was soooo uncomfortable. i drank like three glasses of water at coughed. when i say insanely hot i mean GOD DAMN AWFUL. thankfully it was only some of my jaw that felt it, and not my entire mouth, that wouldve been EVEN WORSE. thankfully, after five minutes of discomfort, it was gone. phew! i saw some dudes shooting a skate video today. and i was like wowzer! and i put the car in an awkward position so that my mom and i could watch. also, we went to get bagels and there were these pink bagels as the specialty bagel and we were like "what are the specialty bagels?" and the guy was like "cherry" and we were like "that doesnt sound too good" and he was like "they arent too good, they would be, if they actually tasted like cherry, but they dont." i love when people are honest! i didnt PR like i thought i did at chicago, but the pool was so beautiful it didnt matter. <3 cordelia # Wednesday, September 08, 2004 ( 7:59 PM ) it's beautiful, i would say/i wouldnt have it any other way http://grouphug.us/confessions/126865942 haha! this person sounds good. or maybe just really weird. jd salinger... MM! cordelia # Tuesday, September 07, 2004 ( 9:24 PM ) ladies is pimps too the howdy hop was good. my nana left today. i have a cold. i had 3 terrible dreams about swimming, howie and water bottles. they were mega scary! going to bed so that i can get better. clg # Friday, September 03, 2004 ( 6:23 PM ) i must excite myself i have a lot of stuff to think about. i really really really like "sixteen again" by the buzzcocks i Am sixteen, but not again, just for the first time. it's hard to get used to. I was really good at driving home. IE no stalling of the car. i am going to rest. and then go to the howdy hop. MMM! clg # |
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